a pretty good day

Very interesting day today. It was one of those great/tough days. It was tough because of an eczema flare up. So irritating! And a bit disheartening as well. But it was great because God blessed me with some encouragement for my journey.

As I got up, an old song filled my awakening mind and heart. It was an old Twila Paris song entitled, “Do I trust You, Lord?” A part of me tried to go back to sleep because it was really early in the morning. But that song kept playing in my mind and heart. So I got up and decided to listen to it with my headphones, since it was really early.

Eyes closed, heart open, I could feel my spirit beginning to worship. Then one line just planted in my heart. It was one of those moments. “I will trust You, Lord, when I’m blind with pain. You were God before and You’ll never change.” It was like my heart was speaking to my mind, “Isn’t that true? Isn’t it true that God will never change? That He is the same, yesterday, today and forever? Isn’t it true that God has always shown Himself to be faithful? So doesn’t it make sense to trust Him?” To which my mind acknowledged, “Yes, I guess that’s true. Yes it’s true that God never changes. Yes it’s true that He has always been faithful.” “So doesn’t it make sense to make those words your words and worship the God who has always been there?” replied my heart.

So for the rest of my day, the music and lyrics of that old song filled the heart and mouth of this old guy. I found myself singing and humming those words in worship to God throughout the day. And tonight, a thought came to mind… Isn’t that what abiding in Christ is about? Isn’t that what a mind stayed on Christ is about? It’s not about willing myself to abide. It’s about a heart filled with worship. It’s about a mind stayed on the truth and the joy of knowing that God never changes. That even when I’m blind with pain, I can trust God because He was God before and He’ll never change.

What a difference intentionally limiting the “noise” in my life and intentionally focusing on God and what pleases Him makes. For the first time in a long time, I experienced a bit of an attitude of worship throughout my day.

All in all, a good day. Thank you, Father!

Sometimes my little heart can’t understand
What’s in Your will, what’s in Your plan
So many times I’m tempted to ask You why

But I can never forget it for long
Lord, what You do could not be wrong
So I believe You even when I must cry

Do I trust You, Lord? Does the river flow?
Do I trust You, Lord? Does the north wind blow?
You can see my heart, You can read my mind
And You’ve got to know, I would rather die
Than to lose my faith in the One I love
Do I trust You, Lord? Do I trust You?

I know the answers, I’ve given them all
But suddenly now, I feel so small
Shaken down to the cavity in my soul

I know the doctrine and theology
But right now they don’t mean much to me
This time there’s only one thing I’ve got to know

Do I trust You, Lord? Does the robin sing?
Do I trust You, Lord? Does it rain in spring?
You can see my heart, You can read my mind
And You got to know I would rather die
Than to lose my faith in the One I love
Do I trust You, Lord? Do I trust You?

I will trust You, Lord, when I don’t know why
I will trust You, Lord, till the day I die
I will trust You, Lord, when I’m blind with pain
You were God before and You’ll never change

I will trust You, I will trust You
I will trust You, Lord
I will trust You, I will trust You
I will trust You, Lord

I will trust You, I will trust You
I will trust You, Lord

another step…

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